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Monday, October 17, 2005

The First Annual Heavy Soul Day Cruise

In keeping with the times, I figured we might as well organize a sex cruise for all of the hard working individuals here at Heavy Soul. Therefore, I booked a one day charter on the Belle of Brownville for Saturday, October 29. The boat will push off from the River Front Pier in Carter Lake, IA and proceed all the way down to Plattsmouth and back again. The first hour on the boat will consist of a cocktail/oral sex hour, at which time strippers will be available for your servicing pleasure. After cocktails we will move on to the Cocaine/Orgy main course. Make sure to be in close proximity to your friends while you punish two or more strippers at the same time. Finally, the desert course of anal sex, douple penetration, and filling all of a stripper's orifices with sex toys will round out the day (KY Jelly will be provided). Make sure to tip the Captain and crew so that they don't report us to the local authorities. Also, we should be back in time for the Oklahoma game, so no worries. I need Heavy Soul members to RSVP by Sunday, October 23 so that I can arrange for the right number of strippers.

-The Vikings are the dumbest assholes to ever grace this planet. An organized sex cruise? Who the fuck thinks of these things?

Comments:
I would just like to say if I know anyone who can plan this, it should be you big boy.
 
Did anyone else see that Ralph Brown was allegedly on the cruise.

Nebraska Football--home of the most Academic All-Americans in the history of college football, and an equal number of idiots.
 
Screw all of you for being all high and mighty. If I was in the NFL I would jump on the chance to head out on a luxury yacht with a bunch of escorts.

What crimes did they commit, save prostitution, which should be legal anyway?
 
So in other words, what other crimes did they commit other than the crime they committed?
 
Settle down you self-righteous prick. Like you've never done anything illegal?

I think this is fantastic and I bet some bloggers (Gage) agree with me.
 
How come I wasn't invited to your 60th birthday?

You sound like Mike Wallace crossed with my dead grandpa. I'm just waiting for you to use the phrase "damn kids" in a post.

Feel free to censor!
 
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