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Friday, May 22, 2009

License to Kill--The State of Nebraska

In a completely amazing turn in what is becoming our favorite in-state saga since trial of Chief Standing Bear, today Commander Heineman acknowledged that the results of the license plate voting were rigged and threw out the plain, mostly crappy grey plate in favor of one thousand times worse bird and flower plate. Below is our analysis:


What a riveting twist! This is absolutely the one thing that could have made the situation even more of a PR disaster. To recap the events so far, here is what has happened:

plates were put up for a vote->choices were all slightly poor but not offensive->snarky college website decides to rig election to get worst plate voted in->plate gets voted in->state denies results were rigged->state admits results were rigged->state disregards vote and commandeers for new, uglier plate

The governor could rescue a baby otter from a burning building while planting a Husker flag on Mizzou's 50 yard line while raising corn prices $20 a bushel and not be looked upon favorably after this. Rightly or (mostly) wrongly, the State of Nebraska does not like getting fucked up license plates. Recognize, or this will be an issue during reelection. I'm getting giddy shivers in anticipation of some ridiculous statewide political controversy.


Not much to add, other than my neighbors think the bird plates look "pretty faggy."


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