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Friday, November 16, 2007

A Blast From The Past...

So I thought I would follow up our discovery of how influential we are by re-publishing a couple of posts that were two of our most popular writings since we started Heavy Soul. I thought I would do this as it is basketball season again, and after a brief Dana Altman scare, Creighton-itis is back with a vengence.

It probably doesn't help that Nebraska was so bad in football, either.

Anyways, on with the show. First, the one that really started it all from Sambuca. This was posted on Huskers Illustrated, and created quite the firestorm on that message board and on this blog. It was written March 15, 2005:

West Virginia; Do Your Job...

Other than any Nebraska Football Game day, my favorite time of year, hands down, is March Madness.

So many teams, so many stories, so much fun. Seriously, is there a better time to sit in front of a TV for 4 straight days than this weekend?

I'm getting excited just typing this nonsense. This leads me to the subject of this post, which might have confused you. OK, here it is:

Dear Mountaineers,

My name is Sambuca84Proof, I am a 25 year old male, and a HUGE Nebraska fan. Over the years I've been fortunate enough to attend countless college sporting events at Nebraska. Let me repeat that for you WVU fans, I meant Nebraska, NOT Creighton. Please don't confuse. Nebraska has the football team that the whole state talks about year 'round, not Creighton. Red is the color that Creighton fans wear during the fall, not blue.

Growing up in Lincoln, I became a die hard NU fan in every sport. Most specifically in football and basketball. Over the years I took advantage of the poundings that the NU MBB team would lay upon Creighton. Year after year, Danny Nee and his group of athletes would wreak havoc on those slow honkies down I-80. It was beautiful. Then I went to college. Danny Nee got fired. Barry Collier took over, started recruiting average (not good) mid-major athletes, and Creighton started winning. Since then, my college basketball life has been at the satisfaction level of a below average mid-major school. (See Creighton: Tony Beroni Years.)

As you can probably guess, WVU fans, Creighton lives in a dream world. In Omaha, the MVC is greater than the ACC, Big East, Big 12 and SEC, COMBINED. Now that's hard to imagine. But if you live in Omaha, read the OWH everyday, live by the words of Dom Shittell, and praise former Big 8 failure, and current Mid-Major Savior - Dana Altman, imagining becomes easy.

So please West Virginia, I beg you. If you only win 1 more NCAA Tourney game the rest of your school history, just make it on Thursday night. Show the world what you're made of. A big east school, playing top notch teams all year long. You crazy Mountaineers can single handedly shut the door on the hypocrisy of Creighton fans. Well, at least until next season starts.

Thanks & Sincerely,

Proud NU Basketball Fan

God, that pissed people off. Then there was this one, that also seemed to hit a blue-blooded nerve:

Where Do You Stand?!? (February 3, 2006)

In anticipation of the big matchup between Creighton and Drake tomorrow night, I thought I would get something off my chest:

I hate Creighton.

I'm serious. It is one of those deep, passionate hates. The "makes blood rush to your head and impair your judgment when you hear the name" hates.

Why do I care about Creighton? That, dear reader, is a great question. Because let's not kid ourselves--Creighton is nothing. Creighton vs. Drake? On a Saturday? The sound of that does not exactly wake the echoes of greatness, does it? I would rather stay at home and hit myself in the balls with a rubber mallet than watch a glorified high school game like that.But I do care. I have to care. I live in Omaha. I'm surrounded by it. And it is sickening. For several reasons:

1. Creighton fans are frauds. Yeah, I said it. Total frauds. Creighton fan is the guy who lives in Omaha and says things like "they play the game right," "Dana Altman is so much like Tom Osborne--he resonates with people in Nebraska," and "I really think Creighton can make some noise in the Big Dance."

First of all, don't say "the Big Dance," ever. Second of all, Dana Altman is nothing like Tom Osborne, other than the fact that he speaks in monotone during interviews--last I checked, he did not win two National Championships and is not considered one of the greatest college coaches of all time. All this aside, the biggest reason Creighton fan is a total fraud? Because every fall, they break out the red shirt and drive down to Lincoln every Saturday...because they're the biggest damned Husker fan in the world. Pick a side, asshole. Now, I am a member of a similar conundrum: I am a Husker fan through and through, but similarly, I am one of the biggest Kentucky basketball fans in the world. Big difference, though: I have always been extremely open about this fact (probably too open for most people around here), and I, as much as I make fun of Husker basketball, genuinely want them to succeed. Creighton fan inexplicitly hates Nebraska--during basketball season. This is horseshit. Bonus fraud points: Creighton fan similarly hates Nebraska baseball. However, as soon as the Huskers make their way to Omaha to play in the College World Series (yes, Creighton, it's true--playing your joke baseball team is not Nebraska's biggest game of the year like it is for you. It is a speed bump, at best.), there's 20,000 Husker fans running around Rosenblatt. Where do all these people come from? You guessed it: Omaha.

2. Creighton basketball games are a "place to be seen" here in Omaha. *gag* Ugg, I just puked in my mouth. For anyone who has been to a Creighton game, you know exactly what I am talking about. It is where the lawyers and doctors parade their happy ass little family around and drink $30 beers while the kiddies eat Thai food or whatever the fuck they serve at the Qwest Center. Get over yourself! These games are unbearable. There's 15,000+ people there, and you can hear a fucking pin drop. Because everyone is too busy glad-handing and talking about the kick-ass options they have on their new Lexus. Here's a thought: put down your Dippin' Dots, sit down in your cushy seat, put away your Kyle Korver Barbie-inspired bobble head that you paid $200 for on eBay, and watch the goddamned game. Yeah, the game! Remember--the reason all these people are at the arena? That's right! Yes, you absolutely can clap your hands! Feel free to get involved with the game!

3. Nate Funk and Kyle Korver. Sweet Jesus. Get these frat guys out of here. "Those guys are gutsy leaders who are just great shooters." Translation: we like it when pretty white boys are our best players. All you (still!) hear about is how great Nate Funk is and how unbelievable it is that they're still winning without him. "It's Dana's best coaching job yet!" Yet you don't hear Creighton fan talk about the fact that ol' Johnny Mathies is carrying the team this year, and is a better player than Nate Funk (and, weird--the guy is from Kentucky). I guess those cornrows scare the Omaha crowd a bit too much to acknowledge how good this guy is.

There are many, many more reasons to hate Creighton. And even though it is Friday, I do have to get back to work at some point, so I will leave it at three. Please, feel free to add to the madness in the comments!

Ah, memories. Anyways, enjoy. And add more if you feel like (and I really don't want to hear anything about my graduate studies status, by the way).

And in order for us to maintain our lofty #59 standing, I'm going to need a Nebraska Basketball season preview out of ezt or sambuca.

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I'm all choked up...thanks for the memories, GA Hill.
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