In Omaha news: Club Nico closes February 16th. Pour out some liquor for the lamest place in Omaha. Unless you like Goth Parties:



















Yikes. What will Omaha do without their "Wicked Goth Balls?"

(By the way, the answer to that would be "become a better city.")

Apparently their MySpace page says they aren't closing, but that's not what their vendors are saying.


Pete, where are you going to take Steve Francis next time he's in town?

Labels: Club Nico, Douche Bags

While watching Jim Rome yesterday, one of his guest was explaining why the Yankees were still in the playoff hunt. His reasoning was that the AL Central was a weak division and the Yankees would be able to capture the wild card from them. What? Did I miss something? He made his point so emphatically that I had to double check the standings. Every team in the Central, except KC of course, is over .500 and has a winning record against East and West opponents. How could he make such a ridiculous claim and not get called out on it? How do these sports experts know so little? How do you confuse the strongest division as being the weakest? If your job was sports and you were going on a nationally televised show, wouldn’t you do a little homework first? I don’t know, maybe take a quick glance at the standings before going on air. It also pisses me off that no one is calling out the AL East as being weak. Why the fuck not? They only have one team over .500 and their second best team is Baltimore. Now that is a weak division.

Labels: Annoying, baseball, Douche Bags, ESPN sucks

Again, I feel like I'm just pissing in the wind here, but...Mike Greenberg is really, really annoying.

This morning he breathlessly threw out the hyperbole:

"Alex Rodriguez is having the best start to a season in the history of baseball."

Jesus Christ. How can you be just months from completely throwing this guy under the bus to hero-worshipping him? Especially when it is ultimately leading to the Yankees having an 8-10 record and 4 games back from first (sitting in fourth place, half a game in front of Tampa Bay)?

Not only that, but can we really say this is the best start to a season ever? I mean, I'm sure ol' Greeny poured over hours of web time on Baseball Prospectus and everything, but I'm guessing that there have been similar starts. Hell, here are some in very recent history. I'll have a little guessing game...I left out the games played and home runs here because it would be obvious:



Any guesses? Would you say, looking at these stats (in order to see them better, click on the picture and you can actually read the numbers), that one line is the "best start in the history of baseball?" Of course you wouldn't. You wouldn't because, dear Heavy Souler, you are one of sound judgement and rational opinion-making.

So, have you decided who applies to what line? Like I said, these stat lines are from recent history. And when I say recent history, I mean the years 2005, 2006, and 2007. The players are Derrek Lee (2005), Albert Pujols (2006), and A-Rod (2007).



How could you possibly suggest that the greatest start in the history of Major League Baseball--keep in mind, that spans over 131 years--could be incredibly similar to the best starts of the past two years? If it were the best start in the history of baseball, A-Rod's numbers would be about 20% better in virtually every category over the best starts of the past two years. In fact, I would argue that--unless A-Rod stays as hot or gets hotter over the next six games remaining in April--Albert Pujols had the all-around better month. And Derrek Lee's 2005 start could certainly be favorably compared, especially in the "pure hitter" sense.

Again, to people like Mike Greenberg and the majority of those at ESPN, all that matters is the East Coast, and in baseball, that just means Boston and New York. As long as a player hits a bunch of home runs in the month of April and they have a "B" or a "NY" on their hat, it translates into "the greatest start in baseball history."

It is utterly ridiculous, and beyond me that these guys NEVER get called out on stuff like this by ANYONE that joins them on the air. In the era of instant gratification and the need to have up-to-the-minute news five minutes ago, these type of people get a free pass. Well, not anymore, fuckers! Heavy Soul is on your ass!

Labels: Albert Pujols, Alex Rodriguez, Annoying, baseball, Chicago Cubs, Derrek Lee, Douche Bags, ESPN, Mike and Mike in the Morning, New York Yankees, St. Louis Cardinals, Statistics, Sucking

For the love of Christ...I mean, come on, Cubs! How can one possibly love a team that continually does things to annoy the piss out of them?

Look, I wasn't too excited about the fact that the Cubs drafted that Domer Jeff Samaradasdflkjdsafsdalkjasdfljsdka. But reading things like this in the Tribune makes me want to puke:

Meanwhile, quarterback Brady Quinn and several of Samardzija's other
ex-teammates will be among 330 hopefuls attending the NFL combine. They may have to text-message him their 40-yard times, as he currently has too much
information to process to pay much attention to their performances.

"I know it's on the NFL Network, but I'm not going to be able to watch much of it,"
Samardzija said. "I'll call my boys every day and see how they did. Brady, I
don't think he's going to run around too much."

Samardzija is hoping to last long enough for his crew to watch him pitch in a Cubs uniform. He said former teammate Tom Zbikowski and some other pals are planning a spring-break trek to Mesa to check him out. Some could wind up crashing on the couch of the newly minted millionaire."If there's a bunch of people in the stands acting stupid, it's probably them," Samardzija said.

In other words, stay the hell away from Mesa this Spring. A bunch of overrated douche bags will be there.

Christ.

Labels: baseball, Cactus League, Chicago Cubs, Douche Bags, Jeff Samardzija, Spring Training